“Hey, New Tuition!” – President Dorman
In his recent email President Dorman spoke about cool stuff. He mentioned the cafeteria, cute IC students jumping around the Green Field and that it was philanthropic.
He also said that there is a “plan”. A “plan” to BRAND AUB, to make it more… Let’s say, cool. Very much like GAP’s attempt.
And very casually, he also mentioned the “plan” to increase tuition. The same one that AUB students rallied to stop last year. However, this year, Dormen has chosen a more tactical was of doing it.
1) it will be implemented in November
= students will be too busy studying or sitting for their exams.
2) new cafeteria is open
= students will be too busy eating and playing poker.
3) new website is online
= students will be too busy browsing and “making gifts”.
4) aub’s first sex column is out in outlook
= students will be too busy thinking about sex.
Thus the Green Oval would like to ask the Student Representative Council the question: what are we going to do now?
Actually, Elias is doing something, we are not sure what he is doing, but it’s something. Anyway and more importantly,